Comes a Horseman

I've never been one to subscribe to the idea of karmic law. I have
danced in the debate before on many different fields. And my end
conclusion is that the wiccans, much like any other religion that
has attempted to form under someone's written set of standards,
adopted the idea from an unrelated source in order to shine a more
positive light on the ideals of witchcraft. Karma is not a law to be
feared it is a shield to use when anyone calls you evil.
I do, however, believe in demons. Or at least the entities construed
as demons. Personal challenges and regrets. Nightmares and feelings
on impending doom. Broken hearts and broken minds. We all run into
our own demons from time to time and we either fight them or we
fall. Today, more and more people are falling. Or at their very best
they run away from their problems and try to hide in a dark corner
thinking that the thing hunting them will not be able to find them.
But it always does.
All too often I see people in groups or other forums venting and
complaining about this and that but never show any desire what so
ever to face their problems. Instead they are looking to others to
fight for them.
Advice and support is one thing. There are times when we just need
to know that we are not alone. Or when we do actually become wise we
know enough to ask for help when need be. Help by way of advice from
someone who may have been in our situation. For some of us it is
difficult to find someone to talk to on a higher level at all. There
is not too many actual "elders" around to get good advice from. And
the ones that are elders will be the last people to tell you that
they are.

Life has a funny way of always moving forward no matter what stands
in the way. We can turn down another road but we can't back up. So
when a problem comes along we either react quickly or we get hit
head on and knocked on our mystical Asses.
When we choose to take on a spiritual path that deals heavily in
metaphysical or other forms of energy we sometimes change. In very
nearly a physical sense. This new open gate of energy alters our
minds and bodies. Abilities begin to develop that normally would not
surface without attention. And in practicing with them they become
stronger. Magic is like working a muscle. The more you train and
test it the stronger and bigger it becomes. Which is in itself a
double-edged sword.
As witches we manifest power and change through willpower. The
practice itself is about 30% knowledge and 70% willpower. That is
why you can have all these fools pulling off a lot of stupid shit.
They don't have the brains to know any better but they do have the
will to do it. It is also why you do not have to be a witch at all
in order to pull off a spell.
However, as your will to manifest good things grows so does your
power to manifest bad things. About the first time you say, "I can't
do it" there is no way you are going to be able to do it even if you
do find a way. Your will has turned against your heart and you block
yourself from moving forward beyond the problem.
Self-fulfilled prophesies of doom. And when these things manifest
instead of looking to ourselves we look to the world for something
or someone to blame. I have yet to hear anyone ever say, "I am my
problem."
No one out there is either fully good or evil. Everyone runs the
spectrum. The moral debate in that idea comes in the question: Does
time forgive past sins?
Obviously it does not fade our demons. Negative things that have
happened to us years and sometimes decades ago have a habit of
springing up out of nowhere when there is relationism factor in the
present. Something today that reminds us of something back then. And
instead of facing one problem you now face two. The past and the
present. And suddenly the new problem seems much bigger than what it
really is. Our common response to this bigger problem is to shy away
and complain.
In doing that we turn to others who instead of listening they
complain themselves about their problems which only dwindles our
hope. If those we turn to for advice are having problems too we see
the entire world falling into misery. Now we have 3 problems. The
past, present, and the world. Our list of hiding places grows thin.
Confronted by these three completely separate entities we come to
meet the forth. We give up.

The four horseman of the soul. All created and manifested by our own
heads. It is only a matter of perspective that we see these things
beyond ourselves. Not too many people spend any time outside of
their own heads.

So we try to rewind the mental tape and ask ourselves what we did so
wrong to deserve our current circumstances. And that is where we get
this notion of karma.
"It came back on me three fold!" Not really. You just compounded it
in your own head. And there is not 3 there is 4 and all of them look
exactly like you!

In the end the only tactic you have in fighting them off is by
asking yourself "Which one of these things is the real me?"

The answer is...

(To be continued...)

Angel Snowden-2006